This morning, I was browsing blogs, you know, as you do at 10:23 on a school day when you have fuck all to do. And I saw a couple of newsworthy stories that just basically made me want to kill myself. Let me allow you to share these destructive feelings, and I really hope you do, ‘cuz this shits FUCKING RIDICULOUS:

1. Pitchfork Headline: VAMPIRE WEEKEND TO TOUR WITH BEACH HOUSE, DUM DUM GIRLS. I really wish I was more clever and could come up with hilarious slogans to characterize the boringness of this tour. How about Blah Blah Blasé Tour feat VW, BH and DDG? But god, seriously, does shit like this have to happen? Next thing I know it’s going to be like Kings of Leon with King Khan and the Shrines and Strange Boys except that it would somehow be infinitely better.
2. NME Headline: COLDPLAY FOR GLASTONBURY 2011 SET? It’s like the world is publicly saying that Glastonbury is over and has been over for years. Personally, I like to let the British hold on to their ‘festival experience’ of shitting in trashbags, washing their hair with ginger ale, and just fuckin’ letting loose, man, but I like to consider this news the world letting us know that SXSW is the one right and true festival. I mean, U2 headlining this year, and Coldplay next year? Sign me up for a bullet to the (just washed in beer) head.
3. NME Headline: TOM JONES COVERS BOB DYLAN ON NEW ALBUM. First of all…. what is the NME doing reporting about Tom Jones? Isn’t their readership something like kids between the ages of 15-18 whose brains have been adled by too much glowstick use? So what the fuck do they care about Tom Jones’ new album? Nobody does, really, except maybe the bosses who run Las Vegas, I mean they have to lure the elderly from Florida somehow, right? Anyway, the fact that TJ is covering the one and only true genuis Bob Dylan is enough to make me ill. Thank god he does not choose a classic (god forbid I say that but really) in ‘What Good Am I’. This kind of fuckery is enough to make me spit up on my keyboard.

That’s pretty much it in the world of WHAT THE FUCK, MUSIC? Come back another time when I’ve woken up agitated and want to have a go at things.

DOWNLOAD -> Dum Dum Girls – Heart Of Stone (Raveonettes Cover)

From Origami Vinyl’s blog:

“Over the last 2 months we have been working very closely with the great people over at the non-profit 826LA on helping them create a fundraiser for their free tutoring and workshop programs for children.

What came of it was a lyric writing workshop hosted by LA band The Submarines back in December, called Chickens in Love as coined by the kids. We asked some local musicians to donate time and come down to teach children the basics of lyric composition. Members of Kissing Cousins, Frankel, Hexham Heads, Nico Stai, and The Monolators split up the kids into 6 groups and each created a song of their own. You can see videos of most of them performing the songs at www.826la.com/chickensinlove. The site also allows you to vote for your favorite song/band by donating a dollar. Each dollar donated equals a vote. And a $30 pledge is Tax Deductible! The winning kids band gets the Gold Record and a rockin’ ice cream social!

We then reached out to LA based bands to cover these kids songs and compile them to be released on a Limited Edition LP releasing later this Spring. The artists were extremely generous and really put a ton of love into their kids’ song. The artists involved in this compilation are:

- Fiona Apple with Jon Brion and The Punch Brothers
- She & Him
- Cold War Kids
- Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros
- Tim & Eric
- The Happy Hollows
- Summer Darling
- Dum Dum Girls
- The Growlers
- Crystal Antlers
- The Pity Party
- The Submarines”

much more info at the website + info for a coinciding benefit show at the Echoplex on March 6th!

New ‘queens’ of lo-fi: Dee Dee of the Dum Dum Girls, Bethany Constantino of Best Coast, the chickies in Pearl Harbor, and Nite Jewel got profiled in LA Weekly. It’s a pretty good article but the main problem that I have with it is that it fucking acts like the Smell is the greatest venue in LA and is helping all bands in LA make it. NO. FUCK YOU. The Smell is a shitty little brick building in an alley in downtown and its filled with animals who are 15 or however old (not 18, not drinking age) pushing each other. I hate the Smell.

Queens of L.A.’s lo-fi scene @ LA Weekly

Eternal Summers, Dum Dum Girls, Best Coast, Real Estate, Pearl Harbor….. HOLY SHIT everyone best be at this show… It’s going to be AMAZING.

DOWNLOAD -> Eternal Summers – Fall Straight Back

3-30 Towson, MD – Recher Theatre
4-1 Boston, MA – Paradise Rock Club
4-2 Philadelphia, PA – Voyeur
4-3 New York, NY – Webster Hall
4-5 Millvale, PA – Mr. Small’s Theater
4-6 Columbus, OH – Wexner Center
4-7 Oberlin, OH – Dionysus Club
4-9 Toronto, Ontario – Phoenix Concert Theatre
4-10 Detroit, MI – Magic Stick
4-11 Milwaukee, WI – Pabst Theater
4-13 Omaha, NE – Waiting Room

Also, don’t forget to see Dum Dum Girls at Echo Curio in LA on the 18th of April. Shit yeah!

Download ->Dum Dum Girls – Jail La La

So Crocodiles, as we know, have been building up a much-deserved buzz around them this year. I FINALLY caught them opening for The Raveonettes last week at the Fonda, after missing all their shows this summer and they were great, but probably suited for a smaller venue where the feedback can completely envelope you rather than bounce off the walls and get lost in space.

Sub-Pop’s new signees Dum Dum Girls are another San Diego band that now claims to be an LA band (cough cough SOFT PACK) but I won’t hold that against them. I’m waiting for the whole buzzsaw guitars and reverb-turned-up-to-11 thing to get old to me, but nope, doesn’t seem to happening yet. And the girls do it well.

But if you don’t feel like making the trek to SD, Dum Dum Girls and Pearl Harbor (also a good band) are playing Spaceland on November 28th also with The Tartans. I think that’ll be a good show, you should attend.

Crocodiles @ Myspace
Dum Dum Girls @ Myspace
Pearl Harbor @ Myspace